To a 20 year old that doesn't have their life together

Your 20s are unbelievable years of self-discovery because for the first time in your life, nobody can "really" tell you how to live. While that can be insanely freeing, it's also a ton of pressure. You're forced to ask yourself the hard questions. I can tell you, In my early 20s, I felt terribly lost, confused, doubtful…etc. much of the time. It was like I was starring into a void. A mapless fog for which I had no idea which direction to step in. Every step I did take that didn't lead to wild success or the feeling of "having my life together" in the way I imagined felt like I had horrifically and shamefully wasted my time.

It wasn't until later that I was able to see the failures of that time as a deeply helpful guide. It was those moments and all the emotions that followed that helped me to clear the fog and better see myself for who I am. They were totally necessary and will help inform decisions I make for the rest of my life.

My advice to anyone that doesn't feel like they have it together in their 20s would be to explore. A lot. Feed your curiosities (in a way that's healthy for you) and let go of the need to control your story. Let me remind you that some of the most impactful moments of your life were the ones that you didn't plan for. You might even say those are the experiences that made you the person you are today. Allow your experiences, positive and negative, to be your guide as you enjoy exploring this body and mind you didn't choose and hasn't existed yet for very long.

Let me give you some last bit of reassurance. Lost is how you feel just before your life drastically changes. It's in the discomfort of being lost that we take those steps out of the dark. One step at a time. You're exactly where you need to be.

*This post is not intended to diagnose or replace mental health treatment.